The earlier comments about toilet paper have inspired me. Please place your attention on this lovely prop next to the toilet that in Farsi we call "aftabeh".
So, tired using toilet paper? Is your toilet paper not doing an adequate job of cleaning your oh-so-lovely behind? Looking for an alternative to cleaning your ass? If so, you might want to consider utilizing an "aftabeh" (awff-taw-beh). If it looks like a garden appliance used for watering plants it's b/c it is exactly just that.
In Iran and across the Middle East people don't use toilet paper silly. They wash their ass with water by way of an aftabeh. No really, they do. Parents teach their kids proper technique at a very young age, spending years washing their kids ass until the kids are old enough to operate it independently.
I know it sounds gross and what not but think about it, if the ultimate goal is to have a clean ass after a number 2 (and I mean a truly clean ass) are you better off using toilet paper or washing yourself with your hands and water? Logically i'd say using an aftabeh is the more sanitary of the two alternatives but let's just hope that folks who use an aftabeh wash their hands with soap when done =)
Please click here to purchase your very own state of the art aftbeh: http://www.gardeners.com
Funny survey I found on the net below:
the purpose of the following survey was to find out what issues/challenges Iranian immigrants had met living outside Iran.
- 91% stated their biggest issue, is the difference
between running water & toilet paper.
- 87% percent of this group stated that it took them
more than two & half years to get used to paper.
- 74% of this group said that they still dream about
AAftAAbeh.
- Of this 74%, 61% sometimes during their stay, bought
either the authentic Aaftaabeh or the plastic garden
watering tool.
- Only 7.5% of this group were successfully able to
use the Aaftaabeh or the garden variety.
- Due to be sitting on the bowl, the other 92.5% had
difficulty pouring the water out near the correct
location.
- Many gave up after finding it too messy.
- The 7.5% successful people stated, squatting on the
bowl, as the reason for their success.
- 50% of these group had fallen off the bowl several
times, before mastering the art.
- 82% of the unlucky 92.5%, have been taking daily
showers to compensate.
- The other 18%, still taking weekly showers.
- 2% had once or twice brought in the garden hose to
the bathroom, but found it difficult to run outside to
shut the water down with their pants down.
- 1% declined comments.
International Aaftaabeh:
Since the virtual "hood' is currently in the
process of washing the old kaka, I found this one
rather appropriate:
How to say AFTABEH in other languages
You need to read it out loud and with the
proper accent!
italian__________________ coonino pakino
french ___________________ coonasion shorasione
Indian ___________________ coona-ha-he shora-ha-he
English __________________ basan shorer
Russian __________________ shooraeoff koonaeoff
Arabic ___________________ al-coononoka shoratonan
Turkish __________________ ela-coonte Ela-shoor
Japanese _________________ shoorashi Koonahashi
Spanish __________________ E-la-coonte la-shoorte
Esfahani _________________ cooneso shooreso
Shirazi _________________ coonakoo paked
kordy ________________ konaka