last year i treated myself to a workshop about sexuality. during the workshop each participant stood in front of a full length mirror naked. once nude we were asked to describe what we saw-color, texture, shape and the like. we could not use judgement to describe our naked bodies.

here is an example of an objective description: my left arm has a vien that runs from the top of my wrist to the bend of my elbo. it runs over the muscles of my forearm. at the bend of my elbo there is a tan line.

here is an example of judgement: my arms are too big and the skin of my biceps are like chicken skin.(gimme a second i cracked myself up with that one) or i have great breasts.

judgement negative or positive is not seeing what is there. if someone says i have a great ass when they look at themselves what are they seeing? what is great? nothing. now if someone says my ass is very round and the skin is a deep tan color- that is seeing.

how much of what we see in the mirror is based on other peoples points of view? 99% of what we see? someone tells you-you have good hair, so you start looking in the mirror and repeating the mantra instead of really looking at yourself. most people have polarized their bodies into the good,the bad, and the ugly.

you think i'm lying? go to the mirror. uh huh where won't you look? where do you look first? does a story start running?

body types go in and out of fashion like skirt lengths. so, what if we didn't have any judgement about our bodies? why is it a supported notion that everybody is disappointed with embodiment in someway. oh too fat, oh too thin, oh too pale, too round here, too wiggly here, too scrawny there...blah, blah, blah!

you ever get sucked into judging a celebrity's body? you think that doesn't destroy your ability to see you?

what is ugliness anyway? this woman at work is dieting and she laments about her fat stomach and flabby stuff. now when i see her she just looks terrible. before i did not have a point of view about her appearance. i get angry at her when she starts with the bull crap because it's destructive to us all. this woman is ugly to me. it's crazy!

what if we didn't use judgement to define our bodies? what would you look like if you were in allowance of your body? what would it take for us to give up all our judgements of bodies? are we willing to not know what we are looking and begin to gaze at ourselves with newly curious eyes? i don't know about you, but i have way more fun when i'm curious.

interesting point of view that i have a point of view.